This is my story on how I found meditation and started Meditative Wisdom.
In late 1999, after having been through one of the most stressful years of my life in regards to work, I decided to take some time away from the 9-5 work schedule and try to get a better understanding of my life and why I was feeling so stressed out.
Within a couple weeks after beginning my break from work, I began to notice more of a feeling of relief and happiness, but also a feeling of being lost.
It was maybe a week or two after that when I was browsing through a local spiritual magazine and saw meditation classes offered. The idea intrigued me, but yet I didn't know if I would feel comfortable meditating with a group or even what to expect since I didn't have any experience of meditation at that point.
After thinking about it for a week or two I decided to sign up and see what it was all about.
I have to admit that during those first few classes I felt a bit out of place, but that wasn't unusual for me around that time.
As I continued going to the classes, I remember it becoming the thing that I most looked forward to each week. Most likely because it was the only time that I took for myself to pay attention and "listen" to what was going on within.
Like many people I was very externally focused and had lost touch with a very important part of myself, so this was like reconnecting with that part of myself, but was still all new territory.
There were a variety of different types of people in this class, some people with backgrounds in engineering, business, medical and journalism as well as in yoga and bodywork. After each meditation we would each have a moment to discuss what we experienced in that meditation.
It was interesting to hear all the different experiences. Some people just felt more relaxed, other people would explain a journey they went on, some would describe feeling energy or seeing colors in their minds eye. For me it was noticing how busy my mind was before starting and how much more relaxed it was afterward.
I didn't have any experience of a journey or feeling energy, but thought it was interesting that other people were experiencing that. I was coming from a high stress 9-5 computer related career, so my view was skeptical but interested.
Over the next couple years or so I would go on to try different types of meditation and meditative practices; Mindfulness, MBSR, Chanting, Taoist Meditation, Reiki, Energy Healing, Yoga and learned a lot about meditation and myself. I would do about 20-30 minutes of meditation once or twice every day.
It was toward the end of those first couple years that I met a meditation teacher that would change my whole view of the world and my experience of it. He introduced the idea and direct experience of energy, within us and around us.
Up until this point I had no direct experience of energy awareness while meditating, I had only heard other people talk about it, and was a bit skeptical but also interested about the whole idea.
So at this meditation workshop in one of the exercises a few of us were chosen to lay on the floor while another person would assist in the exercise. The teacher instructed the people assisting in what to do.
As I was laying there, I heard the teacher say to the person assisting me to put her one finger on my forehead (brow center) and her other finger on the heart center.
A few seconds later I began to feel a tickle of vibration moving in the center of my body up through my neck and into my forehead which continued to get stronger and more pronounced over the next few minutes.
It was the strangest sensation I had ever felt to that point, but it was after this experience that I knew that I was on to something special.
Within a month or two after that workshop, I became more and more interested in meditation as a lifestyle not just a practice. I noticed that there were people wearing mala bead necklaces during workshops and classes that I attended and didn't really know what they were for, but I wanted to get some of my own and find out.
My first mala was a 10mm indian rosewood mala. It was the only one that I could find locally and it was rather large/long. When I wore it the tassel reached below my navel and I'm 6'2". I felt a bit clumsy with it, but whenever I would meditate I would try to wear it.
There were a few times that I didn't wear it and would notice it being more difficult to stay focused in the meditation.
It wasn't too long after that that I began to notice a pattern. Whenever I would wear it my meditation would go smoother with less distraction and whenever I didn't it wouldn't go as smooth.
I thought it was interesting, but didn't give it too much thought until a future meditation retreat that I went on.
At that retreat, in one of the exercises, everyone that had mala beads were asked to bring them to the front where the teacher was sitting. Then, one by one each person came up and was instructed to hold each set of mala beads, not knowing who they belonged to and describe what they felt from each one.
When it was my turn, I went up and picked up each mala to see if I could feel anything or any differences and it became increasingly clear that each mala (and the material in each mala) contains a different energy. I was quite surprised to notice so much difference in feeling from mala to mala.
After the exercise, the teacher explained to us that every time we use our mala, whether through the action of counting through the beads or even just wearing the mala, the mala absorbs our energy from us during the meditation.
So, the mala is absorbing this deeper meditative energy each time we meditate.
After using a mala for a little while, it will become conditioned to and with your meditative energy.
As time goes on, it will begin to provide a physiological and energetic trigger each time you use it, which will reinforce and make that meditative state more accessible with less effort.
Now after so many years of use, I can pick up my indian rosewood mala in the middle of a busy day and instantly be put into a mild meditative state without effort.
That is the power of a mala when you use it on a regular basis in your meditation practice.
It was at this point that I became very interested in malas and started to collect them. I made a couple myself, bought a few in different countries I visited and also bought a few online. Each one I bought had a different energy or feeling to it.
I began to notice the properties more and more as time went on and would reach for a mala that had the properties I preferred for that meditation.
Another realization I had over the years is that some malas absorb our energy more than others, while others have a lot of their own energy.
Wood malas tend to be very porous energetically and more easily absorb energy whereas gemstone malas already have a strong energy of their own that varies from gemstone to gemstone. That's one of the reasons why I love malas so much, such a wide variety of experience and usefulness.
More recently, in the last couple years or so, as I had accumulated more than 17 years of daily meditation practice I began to realize that it was time for a shift in my life.
As I was pursuing my career in IT over the years, I was also passionately pursuing and developing my spiritual awareness through meditation, qigong, reiki, yoga, energy healing - attending retreats, workshops and classes as often as possible throughout the years, spending thousands of hours and tens of thousands of dollars on my spiritual education.
The opportunity for a shift actually found me when I was told that my job of 16 years was being discontinued. With my IT career seemingly coming to an end and with meditation and spirituality being such a big part of my life, it felt like the right time to make a change.
It was shortly after that that I decided to turn my passion for meditation into a business and started Meditative Wisdom.
If you should have any questions about anything, please don't hesitate to contact me.
Wishing you the best,